Experience – Dream Job

I shared my experience about landing my dream job at my dream company earlier this year. Here it is!

Good morning everyone. Thanks for coming today. I’ve been practising Nichiren Buddhism for the last 6 years.

Today I’d like to give you a bit of a glimpse into my life and how I’ve changed since I started practising, sort of like before and after photos, without the photos.

My life started in a small town in India with a highly educated, picture-perfect, close knit family. However, my early years were rife with deep suffering. I was a victim of emotional abuse and neglect. I was sexually abused for over a decade and never told anyone. I grew up with guilt, shame, fear, panic, helplessness and isolation as my close friends. I had extreme anger and a tough facade, the only ways I’d found to protect myself. I grew up hoping that one day I would wake up to find my life was just a bad dream.

As a little child, I also have bright vivid happy memories of deep love and joy with my father. This relationship changed as I grew older. My father’s love came with high expectations. He pushed me to be the best at everything. I felt I deserved to occupy space only if I was achieving academic excellence. This caused me extreme anxiety. I did everything possible to avoid failing and later I avoided doing my best so I could justify my failure.

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Changing My Work Environment

My vow for kosen-rufu continues to provide me with a reliable steering wheel to determine the best direction for my life. - Ananda Gautami https://mynewhumanrevolution.wordpress.com

Last Sunday I went to the SGI General Director’s lecture. He spoke about his work situation, how last year he found himself in an increasingly toxic work environment with rampant bullying and back-stabbing. He started to pray to somehow be able to use his beliefs, abilities and values to contribute at work in the best way, somehow, whether it was this job or another one.

Earlier this week I went to a new group meeting. A new member, a young woman, was asking questions about how she wants to grow in her career and finds that she’s stagnated in her current job in what she can learn and where she can go. She had been praying to find a new job but hadn’t found it yet, how should she pray about it.

Her words and attitude reminded me of my old self – that saw a ladder to be climbed and how I had a path in my mind and if my life or my career didn’t match that path, I was somehow not doing my best or failing.

No, I didn’t burst her bubble. I tried to relate from my own experience. I saw she was stuck in the mindset of what the job is giving her rather than what she is contributing.

This conversation flowed into a self-reflection for me. I realised that I had not been praying about my job situation. When I asked myself whether I was able to contribute from my best self and whether I was expanding my contribution in the best way, or had I become complacent and was going along with the status quo? Funnily enough all of this coincided with events at work.

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